Friday, September 28, 2007

Lessons About The Way We Treat People

I received this from an old acquaintance today. I thought this would be worth sharing until I come up with something else to blog about.

Note: You would have probably seen some of these floating around for some time. I have received these stories several times over and it always serves as a gentle reminder about how I should treat people.

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Five Lessons to Make Us Think About The Way We Treat People

Lesson 1 - The Cleaning Lady

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one:

"What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

"Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello."

I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.


Lesson 2 - Pick Up In The Rain

One night, at11:30 p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance, and put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached.

It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away... God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."

Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.

Lesson 3 - Always remember those who serve

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.

"How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked.

"Fifty cents," replied the waitress.

The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.

"Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.

By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient.

"Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.

The little boy again counted his coins.

"I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies.

You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.


Lesson 4 - The Obstacle In Our Path

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway.
The peasant learned what many of us never understand - Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.

Lesson 5 - Giving When It Counts

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister.

I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded.

He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away".

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.


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"Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, and dance like you do when nobody's watching."

41 comments:

Lady Patsy said...

Hey nice posting JT and how true!

When I was working in my old office in town, the first people I would meet every morning when I came in would be the security guards and I saw no harm in wishing them "Good morning' or making small talk with them.

One day my colleagues and I came down for lunch and as we passed the guards' counter I greeted them and asked whether they had their lunch. One of my colleague was shocked and asked me, "You actually speak to these people?" I answered "Yes and I don't see anything wrong in that!" The look she gave me was as if i had committed a major crime or something.

It was then that I realised that we have many 'snobs' amongst us who believe that its beneath them to speak to people like guards, garbage collectors, road sweepers etc.

My father always made it a point to go out of his way to speak to such strangers simply because he felt that they too deserved some respect.

In fact I think we were the only ones in our neighbourhood who would invite a salesperson in and serve them drinks even though we did not buy anything. My father said that we should show them some appreciation for all the talking they did :)

What my father taught me was that we should never judge a person by his/her occupation or social standing because even a mighty king would not be able to sit on his throne if not for his ordinary foot soldiers!

Pak Zawi said...

j.t.
The fourth and fifth stories are new to me. When I was small my mum used to tell me when we remove obstacles along a path we will be rewarded even if we used our foot to remove it. More rewards if we use our hands.
Really apprecite the fifth story. Kids are innocent but they have a soft spot in their heart and would die to save the love ones.

Lady Patsy,
Your personal story is great. Your friend is no less learned yet her attitude is much regretted. Thats life as I see it. It takes all kind to make up this world.

winniethepooh said...

Kids are so innocent yet they always taught us the most valuable lessons in life.

The little kid buying icecream is so sweet, he definitely put the icecream lady to shame..and the little boy who did the blood transfusion; he's ready to "give up" his life for his sister! how noble can that be.

Nowsaday, even when people ask if we will sign a donor card (to donate ur organs should we meet with an accident and die, just SIGN, not as if we are already GIVING) we aint as "noble" as the little boy!)

Anonymous said...

JT:

Thanks for this posting. Brought me back to thebasics - in a good way. Thanks again, maam.

Bangkai

pearly said...

JT dear :
Again a lovely story you share wit us . I love the lesson 2 one cos it come a cross to my best friend ..
on her birthday we all go out with her to chinese restrant have diner and one of our friend come out with a joke to play on my friend Ena and she ask me to go a cross the table there 2 black men having diner my job is to walk a cross and I ask one of them to walk to Ena and say I am your tonight should I give you a kiss that wat I supose to ask one of the guy to do I ask the first one he say my friend will do it ok .
and I look at the ohter friend he say sure ... so he walk to Ena and say happy birthday to her and give her a kiss ( Ena love black men ) that why this joke play on her . then the other men walk up to the waitree and ask to bring us the most expensive bottle of champain to us is cost £35 a bottle waitess bring around to our table we would like WOW this men really fucy you huh . the best bit is here now ...
Ena walk one of our friend out the restrant and walk by the black men who buy her a bottle of champain and he stop Ena and say hapy birthday to you ! you don't remeber me ? Ena say ,NO ! the black men say you have save me once by giving me £2 so I can get a bus home long time ago . then that click Ena mine she rember that once a black boy ask her can she sprek him £2 cos his wallet was nik he lost al his money and he need to get home , ena without secound thougth and just give it to him .
today there meet in the restrant his thank to her was giving . Ena say to him ..OH god Bless you he reply no * god bless you cos of your kindness to help .
your story is the same morol of ENA
*wat come around goes around* .
I love each of the story thank for share this xxxxx
p/s
will not been around for a few day xxwill miss you

Chen said...

although i have read them many times, but i still love reading it. There are many things that we tend to overlook in life :)

ruby ahmad said...

Hi JT,

Thought I'd hop by and say hello to you. Thank you so much for dropping by my blog to ask about my well being. So nice of you. Hey, we can still say hello on Facebook. Fun ain't it? Take care and cheers.

J.T. said...

Hey Pat

Your father taught you well. It is true that we should never judge a person by his/her occupation or social standing. I am sure you know that I've observed enough to appreciate the difference. ;)

Thanks!

P.S. I finally found time on a Saturday night to blog (oh dear...what am I doing home on a Saturday night? :D)

J.T. said...

Hi Zawi

I like what your mum said - "when we remove obstacles along a path we will be rewarded even if we used our foot to remove it. More rewards if we use our hands." It is well said and makes a lot of sense.

Thanks for sharing that with us. :)

J.T. said...

Hi Winnie

I feel we lose our child-like innocence when we go through the trials and tribulations in life. These lessons (along with our elders' advice) make us wary about many things.

I know it is impossible to wish it but if everyone retained his/her innocence in life, I think this world would be a better place.

J.T. said...

Hi Bangkai

Thank you for your thoughtful comments. Appreciate it, sir. :)

J.T. said...

Hi Pearly dear

Glad you like those stories. I never get tired of them no matter how many times someone sends me the story.

And Pearly, I love Ena's story. Isn't that wonderful? Ena's kindness was remembered. She must have felt good that night - someone remembered and showed her his appreciation for what she did years before.

Thanks for that sharing.

P.S. I'll miss you too. Have fun with whatever you are going to do that's taking you away from blogging for a few days.

J.T. said...

Hi Chen

I so agree with you. We sometimes do tend to overlook some simple things in life. I guess this happens because we are only human and we do get caught up with our own lives and some of the struggles that come with it.

Have a good weekend. :)

J.T. said...

Hi Ruby

Thank you soooo much for taking some time off your busy schedule to drop by here to say hello.

You know, I forget that I can use Facebook to keep in touch too. I like Facebook but I am not addicted to it. I tend to forget to use their fun stuff. :)

Wishing you a good weekend. Oh wait.. weekend is almost over in Malaysia (still Saturday night here in the States!). OK, wishing you are good week ahead. :)

Pi Bani said...

Yep, treat people the way we want to be treated! End of story... :)

Pak Zawi said...

Pi,
I guess that is what is keeping you going with your voluntary work. Doing something that you want others to d unto you should you be in their shoes. Great work Pi. Allah will reward you amply.

J.T. said...

Hi Pi

How very true! Thanks. :)

Nightwing said...

Hi JT, nice post. Agree with your posting with regards in treating people.

You have a great week ahead.

trueblue said...

These are great stories. Thanks for sharing them!

I personally like the first lesson. Its true we sometimes take this people for granted. They're human beings too. It wouldnt hurt to know their names.

NaNa said...

Hi JT,

I hopped to your blog from Zawi's.

The 5th story is new to me. I love to read all these inspiring stories regardless of many times I have seen them before.

I particularly like the 3rd story. The first time I read about it, I felt so touched. Kids, in the own naive ways, sometimes, can be more thoughtful than adults.

Typhoon Sue said...

the last story is especially touching. what a sacrifice he was willing to make for his sister!

Makcik Runner said...

i like all the stories especially stories about big-hearted kids in their own special way. it just goes to show their thoughtfulness and earnest sincerity are so pure something we adults can learn from and embrace it.

J.T. said...

Hello Nightwing

Thanks for your comments. You have a great week too. :)

J.T. said...

Hi Trueblue

Yes, they are human too. As the professor said in the story, "All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello"."

Getting to know their names and knowing them brings us one step closer to acknowledging that they matter.

J.T. said...

Hello Nana

Welcome to my blog. :)
Happy to know that Zawi's blog brought you here.

Children's thoughtfulness (among other traits) makes this saying so true, "While we try to teach our children all about life,Our children teach us what life is all about."

J.T. said...

Hello Sue

It is touching, isn't it? He was willing to give up his life for his sister. What a brave little boy!

J.T. said...

Hi KC

Totally agree. As I mentioned in my comments to Nana, " ... our children teach us what life is all about."

Thanks for your thoughtful comments. :)

Melissa said...

How true are all those stories..I guess from time to time we need a dose of these lessons to remind us that all of us are equal. Afterall, we are only human..

Hope all is well with you, take care deary.

Lots of love from down under ~m

J.T. said...

Hi Melissa

I agree with you that we are all created equal. Stories like these give us gentle reminders that it is so.

I'm okay over here. A little busy on some days. Wish I had more time to blog but I cannot complain. At least I am occupied and not feeling bored. :)

Hugs Cuz. :)

Mat Salo said...

Beautiful stories, JT...

Mmmm, BTW that picture of you with LP in the wedding dress, SO alluring lah . . .

J.T. said...

Hi Mat Salo

Thank you for your lovely comment ... and flattering compliment. For sure I cannot sleep tonight! ;)

the witch's broo said...

Hi JT,

thanks for the stories.

it is so easy to forget about kindness and charity.

J.T. said...

Hi Witchy! :)

So agree with you.

Thanks for dropping by and for your thoughtful comments.

ruby ahmad said...

Hi JT,

I love all the stories here. The one that touched me the most is of course the lil boy with ice-cream. They are definitely good lessons.

The peasant with the boulder, actually it is everyone's duty to remove any dangerous item in any path, be it nail, stone or whatever. Just that people are too self absorbed these days.

Cheers dear and thanks for sharing.

J.T. said...

Hi Ruby

I guess it is because people are too self absorbed these days, they forget about the simple and thoughtful things to do.

Having said that, I believe for every self-absorbed person out there, there is another whose actions help restore our faith in people.

Thanks for your thoughtful comments.

Cheers! :)

Pak Zawi said...

j.t.
The trend now is not to remove obstacles in peoples path, instead they put more to it. Nails are thrown on motorcycles path so that they will puncture their tyres for the purpose of providing repair job. The worst case is for the breakdown vehicles to 'accidentally' spill used lubricant on roads to induce a skid and later tow the damaged car for repair and a fee. Recently my son was involved in one on the way to Subang Airport on one rainyday. Luckily he only spunned around and not roll over and thus the damage was only to the vehicle for hitting the guard rail. Do they care for people's life and property? Heck no, they only care for their own pocket. How can they use such monies to feed their family.

J.T. said...

Hi Zawi

That is a criminal act and yet authorities have not clamped down on people who carry out those irresponsible deeds. I wonder how they sleep at night knowing they cause harm and injury to others.

Thank God your son escaped unhurt.

Thanks for dropping by again. My mind has been a little distracted and am not able to blog. Everytime I try to write another post, my mind goes blank. :)

I hope I can come up with something soon.

Take care and have a great day.

zaitgha said...

jt,

i had similar story with lady patsy..where when i was working, the first person i saw in the ofc was our cleaning lady cum tea lady...i would wish her good morning and had small chats with her and thanked her whenever she came to clean my desk...and one day one of my subordinate who came very early saw me chatting with this aunty and later asked why i was talking to the lady and told me if should not do that as she was after all just a cleaning lady...i got my staff into a room and gave her a sermon of her life ha ha ha....too bad that snobs are everywhere

btw....i like this posting very much...

SpikeySpikey said...

JT, the stories are very touching. I think in our lives nowadays we are either to busy to stop and do some kindness and just ignorant bout it. Anyway, good post! :)

J.T. said...

Hello Zaitgha

Bravo! I am glad you gave your staff a good sermon.

When I was working in KL (as an office manager), we had this part time tea lady that came in to clean up the office and wash up any dirty mugs. That was all she had to do.

One day, she looked distressed and asked me if she is supposed clean tiles directly outside the office door. I told her only if it is very dirty and mopping should take care of it temporarily. (the building maintenance people usually take care of the floors outside the offices). Then, she said that one of the consultants suggested that she get on her knees and scrub the tiles outside the office door. I was shocked and told her that she will do no such thing. She is not the consultant's maid. I added that if the consultant should bring it up again, she will have to deal with me.

It is a pity, we have such people in this world. They take advantage of others.

Thanks for dropping by again, Zaitgha. :)

J.T. said...

Hello Spikey Spikey

Thanks for dropping by and leaving such thoughtful comments. Appreciate it. :)